Things that would have made today a little easier:
A louder alarm clock. A faster morning train. An extra seat on said morning train. A nose guard to keep that fly out of my right nostril (bug was seriously pissing me off). A cool-pack for my lunch. Faster clocks at work. A wet-wipe at the art store (pastels are way more messy when they don’t match your shirt). A faster evening train. An extra seat on said evening train. A turnstile higher or lower than my crotch, either would be fine. A key that actually unlocks my front door. A nice long backrub. Okay, I know that one’s not a “thing” but it would still be nice.
Good night July twenty forth two thousand and seven. I don’t know if I will miss you. But at least we did this thing together.
7/24/07
Worth the wait
Three words continue to come up in my career and life as an artist: preparation, persistence, and patience.
I am not by nature a patient person.
When I attended the School at Steppenwolf, we started the entire summer with this quote by Rilke:
…all progress, must come from deep within and cannot be pressed or hurried by anything. Everything is gestation and then bringing forth. To let each impression and each germ of a feeling come to completion wholly in itself, in the dark, in the inexpressible, the unconscious, beyond the reach of one’s own intelligence, and await with deep humility and patience the birth-hour of a new clarity: that alone is living the artist’s life: in understanding as in creating. There is here no measuring with time, no year matters, and ten years are nothing. Being an artist means not reckoning and counting, but ripening like the tree which does not force its sap and stands confident in the storms of spring without the fear that after them may come summer. It does come. But it comes only to the patient, who are there as though eternity lay before them, so unconcernedly still and wide. I learn it daily, learn it with pain to which I am grateful: patience is everything!
The first time I read this quote I didn’t fully understand it’s wisdom. I loved it though, if for no other reason than it seemed to defuse the responsibility and pressure to be instantly fabulous. It wasn’t until two years later when SiNNERMAN put up it’s inaugural show that I started to appreciate this kind of patience.
We all worked terribly hard. Sometimes together. Sometimes not. But when we stopped trying to work together and started playing together and trusting each other we gave birth to something that had been conceived two summers ago. It took two years but our lives seasoned our play. And it was beautiful. I guess this whole patience thing isn’t so bad after all.
I am not by nature a patient person.
When I attended the School at Steppenwolf, we started the entire summer with this quote by Rilke:
…all progress, must come from deep within and cannot be pressed or hurried by anything. Everything is gestation and then bringing forth. To let each impression and each germ of a feeling come to completion wholly in itself, in the dark, in the inexpressible, the unconscious, beyond the reach of one’s own intelligence, and await with deep humility and patience the birth-hour of a new clarity: that alone is living the artist’s life: in understanding as in creating. There is here no measuring with time, no year matters, and ten years are nothing. Being an artist means not reckoning and counting, but ripening like the tree which does not force its sap and stands confident in the storms of spring without the fear that after them may come summer. It does come. But it comes only to the patient, who are there as though eternity lay before them, so unconcernedly still and wide. I learn it daily, learn it with pain to which I am grateful: patience is everything!
The first time I read this quote I didn’t fully understand it’s wisdom. I loved it though, if for no other reason than it seemed to defuse the responsibility and pressure to be instantly fabulous. It wasn’t until two years later when SiNNERMAN put up it’s inaugural show that I started to appreciate this kind of patience.
We all worked terribly hard. Sometimes together. Sometimes not. But when we stopped trying to work together and started playing together and trusting each other we gave birth to something that had been conceived two summers ago. It took two years but our lives seasoned our play. And it was beautiful. I guess this whole patience thing isn’t so bad after all.
7/23/07
Living simple is risky
"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler" - Henry David Thoreau
I would just simply like to add.
Life is worth the risk!
I would just simply like to add.
Life is worth the risk!
7/22/07
On my Mark...
Well, and so I begin again.
I spent last week with a group of artists that both challenge and inspire me. A good combination to have in any commune I guess. The week was full of so much laughter and life and heartache and un-rest that I think I will relive it as long as I have a stitch of memory in my brain. I will try hard.
I’m glad you’re here. I hope you stop by often. I hope you tell me so. However, the only thing I can promise is that when I do write it will be simple and honest. That’s my goal for life right now. I’m riding a ripple from the splash that is my life and when the water is calm again I hope I can look at the reflection and say “yes, that’s what I thought”.
I’m excited to start school. And by excited I mean terrified.
I’m going to be very close and at the same time very far from the things and the people I love. I hope I’m ready.
Get set. GO!
I spent last week with a group of artists that both challenge and inspire me. A good combination to have in any commune I guess. The week was full of so much laughter and life and heartache and un-rest that I think I will relive it as long as I have a stitch of memory in my brain. I will try hard.
I’m glad you’re here. I hope you stop by often. I hope you tell me so. However, the only thing I can promise is that when I do write it will be simple and honest. That’s my goal for life right now. I’m riding a ripple from the splash that is my life and when the water is calm again I hope I can look at the reflection and say “yes, that’s what I thought”.
I’m excited to start school. And by excited I mean terrified.
I’m going to be very close and at the same time very far from the things and the people I love. I hope I’m ready.
Get set. GO!
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